Just to get things started

My daughter just turned two in july...what a change in her I saw from about 18 months till now...The stuggle for independance that happens at this age can only be rivaled by teenage angst.No is her favorite answer to me.Explaining she isnt allowed to tell mommy no is like speaking to the wall.Im doing some potty training with her and she doesnt want my help with it much she wants to go on her own terms she wants to dress herself her fashion sense consist of her daddys socks pulled up to her thighs and pantys and this is how she wants to go bye-bye!Her mess making has gone way up too and she is FOREVER getting into the fridge or something else really messy.Im kinda used to the terrible twos after the other two and knowing Ill be going through it agian soon I have found its best taken with a grain of salt.Most of the stuff she does is cute.Her temper tantrums are not cute.I have found through shcool hours that when I wake her up early she will nap and go to bed more consistantly.I too look in her face and at the portriats on the wall and wonder where my baby went.She is definitly a lil monster but shes such a cute lil monster and shes mine with this in mind I am able to laugh through "most" of the hard times.

You know, the sleep issues may not have as much to do with toddler independance as teething. My 21 month old just got through cutting her eyeteeth (started around 17 months or so) and that was really really really hard on her. Those 'fangs' look like they hurt coming through! Now I think she might be working on her 2nd year molars--but thank goodness we'll be done after that!

For some reason, Fia never displayed much distress during the day. But at nighttime, when she was already tired and didn't have the distraction of go-go playtime she had a really rough time of it until the teeth were through.

I have a 2 1/2 year old. I also have a 10 year old son. The 2-3 year olds are the WORST when it comes to throwing fits! Its a hard age because it really does drain you everyday to deal with it. One thing I was lucky with was potty training. I found potty training charts ( free to print) at ablebaby.com. She was trained before she turned 2!
I don't allow her to kick and scream at nap time. I give her about 10 min to talk to herslf and play in her bed. Then if she has not started to settle down I just go in and tell her its time to go to sleep or you will get a paddle. I do not snack my kids ALL the time But I also do ot let them run the house. The parents are the boss and that is that. Yes teething can cause sleeping problems. You just have to ride it out. I look at my 10 year old when I am having a BAD day and remember how FAST they grow. Then its on to the preteen years!! Let me tell you it goes from one thing like tantrums to being mouthy and wanting to be with friends every second of the day!! Ahhh parenthood!! We all have good days and BAD days when we wonder why it was we wanted kids in the first place!! LOL

...although he's been bad about swatting me lately. Amazingly, he'll still give in and say "o-kay" when I ask him to do something. But the one who is *still* throwing awful tantrums is my 3yo boy! What is up with that? He is the most strong-willed child! He is also an introvert, so it's harder to connect with him. He wants me to kiss & hug him goodnight, but he's contrary about it, so he pulls away and won't say so until I blow him a kiss and walk away. LOL! He's like that about everything. Whew! When I can leave him with Daddy, I do. He gets along better with Daddy, who has more authority, but is also more playful than Mommy.

and a couple of older children -- i just *love* the toddler age -- it is absolutely my favorite . I tend to find it more challenging as they grow older and i expect more, but 17 months is still a baby LOL (really! i swear it!)

it sounds as if she is ready for a change in sleeping patterns. we've never 'forced' sleeping and they just seem to get to a point where they need to fall asleep and then they usually nurse or can be cuddled, driven, rocked, slung, etc to sleep. I do find it challenging when their patterns change though -- just when i thought i had it figured out! a really good book for evening routines and sleep is _the no cry sleep solution_ by elizabeth pantley. there are some excerpts on her site http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth/content/sleepbooksummary.htm

I have also had the same experience w/ night waking being related to teething. I have had good luck w/ the homeopathic remedy chamomilla -- i know others that have really like the Hylands Teething tablets and of course there is always tylenol

anything that i don't want to be gotten into or creates too much of a headache for me if they do get into it (like terribly messy projects) is put away so i rarely find no to be an issue at this age -- since if they don't see it, it doesn't exist. Hmmmm.... some safety things come up -- primarily the car seat -- so finding ways to make that pleasant is an ongoing project. as for handholding all of mine preferred to be slung until 2 or so.

i have found that for me it really is a matter of my expectations and if i don't have any about any certain behaviors than i am free to enjoy whatever comes along.

My 5yr old DS is still prone to tantrums, and even his 7yr old sister will have the occasional meltdown. Not that DS is a generally grumpy child, just one of those delightful up and down kids whose every emotion is magnified and right below the surface!! More joy from him than from his sister, but he's very tiring too.

Right now he's tired because he has to get up at 6am to go drop his sister at school, but his own school is 1-5pm. It's only been a few days, but boy does it ever show! Jenn, it sounds like you've got one of these too - I think they probably come under the 'spirited' labe if you were to read something like Mary Sheedy Kurcinka (I haven't, but somehow it sticks in my head!). These kids are far more exhausting than most of the ones you see around, and it's easy to get to screaming point when there just isn't any let-up. The endless questions and arguing and tantrums and the highs and lows... Sometimes I use up prayers just hoping DS will take a breath between sentences one day! The nonstop talk alone is enough to get right inside me and make my skin crawl from the inside out.

I hear arguments now as the older hellion and the younger 'spirited' child go 'at it'. I wish she'd take it out on her classmates, but no, she prefers to be a doormat at school and be nasty to everyone at home!

I thought I'd get a break between toddler and preteen at least. Used to be safe until they were teenagers...

Kerri.