So Far, Semi-Good

can the girls, or at least Jo, get their own breakfast? Both of mine do that and their packed lunches for school now too, and DS has been doing it at least breakfast since he was probably under 6. Obviously it requires that I provide them with things they want to eat and that I'm happy for them to eat, but even DS has learned to make his own porridge from instant packets in the microwave. I realise you probably avoid anything which is in individual packets, but sometimes there are ways to store things that make it easier on the kids. When my Crohn's was really bad about 4yrs ago both kids learnt fast to make their own breakfast and lunch, just reporting back to me so I didn't have to move more than necessary.

I don't know how much yours do for themselves but if there are areas where they can help you it helps them to become more independent as well as making your life easier. I explained it to mine that I had a limited amount of energy, and if I use it all up on doing these things for them which they could really do themselves then I'd have none left for doing more important or fun things. Actually I think a combination of illness then and laziness now have probably helped more than anything else I've ever done to get them more independent. I'm not good at letting go generally but since DD is 11 next month and starting high school the month after I know I have to, and saving myself effort on getting their breakfasts and lunches, and walking them to school every morning has done them more good than pampering them would have.

I think I recently saw a book or article that said that lazy parents make the best parents. I can kind of see how that would be possible. When they're left to fend for themselves more, think for themselves and do things that a more active mother might do for them, they get quite a lot out of it. So if you ever feel lazy making the girls do things for you just remember the longer term benefits to them and any guilt will melt away!

as usual, what started as a post about breakfast got totally out of hand!

Kerri.

I'm more than happy to let them do for themselves, but we don't eat cold cereal or stuff in packets, as you guessed. I have to at least have things cleared up enough that they CAN do for themselves, and that has not always been the case.

This week I can start doing porridge again overnight, which they can serve themselves easily, since it will be cooler and rainy. It's been in the 90s and 100s--NOT good porridge weather.

They do often get their own lunch. Josie makes sandwiches or soup, and I'll cut up things to be snacked upon throughout the day. Jo has gotten very helpful as she's gotten older, helping schlep laundry around and helping tidy up. Lou, not so much, but I remember Jo wasn't helpful at her age, either.

Lynn Siprelle, Editor