Hello. I'm Istar.ra 34, single and having problems with - my identy?

Let me explain:

I've been a homemaker for years. I was married at 18 and was a homemaker. I got divorced - and since I wasn't working I needed a place to go - so I moved back home with my Dad.

While at my Dad's - I did work some and meet a new man. He and I got married. While with my second husband, I was basically considered to be a homemaker. He had his own business and I worked with him in his business - thus, he called it 'our business'. BUT to the rest of socitey I was considered a homemaker. He and I divorced.

The next thing I know I found myself back at my father's home. He wanted me to work BUT never pushed the issue. He's not crazy about women working but has seen the problems that I'm facing. BTW, his wife is a homemaker - simply because of their beliefs - yet he wanted me to work because of the "moving in and out of his home" I've done twice.

I met a man on-line and now living with him - the problem is he prefers a woman to work - doesn't like the idea of someone living off him. So, I have to make a choice.... work or go back to my fathers and to meet a new man.

My problem is - I now see where being a homemaker can cause one problems. I loved being a homemaker BUT it can be a problem in the case of divorce or death.

I woke up one day with this in mind: "What's going to happen to me if my father dies? If I divorce, then I have to have a place to go. Is it right for my father to support me? What happens if I get married and my father dies and my husband dies or we get divorced - I'm then on the streets or looking for a place to live."

How are the rest of you dealing with this? I imagine that you'd go to work. Some go to work long enough and meet a new person. The new person in their lives want a homemaker so then your back to becoming a homemaker.

I'm confused becase I love homemaking BUT I think I'd be better off working outside the home - getting my own business.

Can anyone help?

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