Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?

What if you asked her, "why do you think .. xyz?"
This phase will pass .. and before you know it, she'll be a teenager who can't be bothered to speak to her Mother.
Rose

There is nothing wrong with saying "I don't know" if you don't. You can look things up at the library with her.

Oh my...we're just putting these days behind us at my house (DS is 3.5 years old). This probably isn't the "nicest" strategy, but after "Why?" number 3 or 4, I would just say "I don't know....", letting my voice trail off. I would then change the subject, or just ignore the subsequent barrage of questions. After a while, he would just give up.

BTW, we can have quite lovely conversations now

I don't know if this is appropriate child-rearing, but I used it with my pre-K classes when I taught them-- to the question, "why aren't machines made of the same things animals and plants are," I would say something a little over their heads like, "Because live things have to be made out of something called carbon, even though carbon isn't alive all by itself, and machines don't have to be carbon-based. But machines can run on fuel made of carbon, like gas, and live things can have machines put in them like if a person has a heart problem." It was actually pretty amazing how well the kids would get the gist of a long explanation like that, but it took them a while to figure it all out, which caused them to be quiet while they thought about it.

the phrase, "because I said so" came into being! Sometimes answering a long string of senseless 'whys' can create a situation which is close to answering back, so there does occasionally come a point when parental feet get put down and the discussion is firmly ended!

this is especially the case when the why turns into a whining "but why??"

DS5 1/2 is still goin on endless chatter and whys, which means that DDnearly8 talks a lot less (though she still tends to take over when DS dozes off or isn't around!). They do grow out of it to some extent, but the hard part is to keep your sanity while they're growing!

plenty of sympathy from me, for sure.

Kerri.

Thanks everyone! It helps just to have people commiserate! Funny, but I actually considered telling Danika that machines aren't alive because they aren't carbon-based! (I didn't, though ... maybe next time I will!) Asking Danika what she thinks usually works if she actually knows the answer to the question, but her stock response to a questions she can't answer is "yes!"

Danna =]

I have also used the "I don't know" method to great effect. When I just had one kid asking me all those whys, I used to try to answer all of them like you're doing with Danika, but when it got so that I had three of them all wanting to know things like that, I couldn't take it sometimes. Especially because they seem to always do that to me when I am in the middle of driving in difficult traffic or something like that. So eventually it got so that I answered the question if I could and I said "I don't know" if it was too complicated for me. And when I say that, they generally stop. The truth is, sometimes I don't know the answer or sometimes I kind of know but I don't know how to explain it. I feel like it's fine to tell them that. Sometimes I say, "I don't know how to explain that" rather than just "I don't know." It's honest, but it doesn't generally lead to another question. Sometimes I also refer them to Daddy, as in "You'll have to ask Daddy that when he gets home." Some things he just knows more about.

Just remember, she will grow out of this. I'm not sure when since my 7 year old still does this occasionally, but I'm sure they outgrow it someday and at least she doesn't do it nearly as often as she used to

Lauralyn

Did my first daughter ever do this. The problem was, her questions were too nonsensical to answer properly. I would say, "I don't understand the question." That's not exactly fair, I guess, because how well can a 3-4 year-old articulate what they want to know? But it was the truth.

Great insight into why children ask why, LotH! I'll try to remember that and be more charitable to Danika next time (which should be coming up any second now!)

Danna =]