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I'm frightened, now
Marmite paste sounds terrifying.
I can't vouch for English food, but the food I had in Scotland was either bland, bland, bland, or bland. After a while I started craving anything with a flavor.
How about
"ethnic-lite" or "spice-phobic ethnic" or "flavor-challenged ethnic"?
Anhata
www.familynaturally.com
Your Family's General Store, Naturally