it's miserable when it all hits at once. Would it be helpful if you got out and about a bit more. I don't know whether you're doing much gentle exercise - I'm sure you must be, on doctor's orders. The thing with this time of the year is that obviously there are less days when it's an option, or a pleasant option. Is there somewhere new but quite peaceful you could go for a bit, or somewhere where you always feel calm and happy. Somewhere away from John and the kids even, where you could just sit and breathe and be for a little while. I know that there are some places where I just look around me and feel the stress melting away, and I know there are times when I have to go look for that kind of place somehow.

the worst part, which you are probably already well aware of, is that this is likely to get harder before it starts getting easier. It's good that you have a really supportive husband to keep you going. You've been through so much Lynn, and you'll get through this too.

Kerri.