witchiepoo, I just was over on the Perfectionist thread and something suddenly hit me when looking at your score of 72. Mine was 59 on that test, but I can tell you 2 years ago it would have been much higher.

From experience, I know being a perfectionist can make it hard on the rest of the family, trying to live up to our expectations. What we see as "just do it right and I won't say anything else" comes across to them as controlling and aggressive and "in their face". It sometimes brings on anger from kids because they feel nothing they do is ever "right". At least that was what was going on in my house. I noticed you said your son is a perfectionist too, so you all may be double dosing there!

What helped me was that my sister just kept insisting that I go to an Iridologist that she had been to see and was also taking some classes from. I finally gave in and went. She also did what they call (I think) muscle testing. . .letting your body tell her what it needs as far as natural remedies,etc. I would never have believed it if I hadn't experienced it. Of course everyone's needs would be different, but she
found I needed Red Chestnut, Bach drops. The effect was amazing. My stress levels dropped, my children doing things their way instead of my way seemed not to matter so much anymore, which in turn eased tensions around my house. Pretty soon, my snappiness with them was pretty much gone and even Dad was saying "Thank God for Mom's drops".

I'm not telling you this to encourage seeing an Iridologist, but rather to emphasize what a difference lowering stress levels and what kids see as unreasonable expectations can make in how we act and react with our children.

I'm also not insinuating that the problem is yours and not your sons, but rather, just giving a little food for thought. All that said, I would not let down my guard in trying figure out what else may be going on with him and dealing with it as I mentioned in my first post.

I apologize for blathering on here, but seeing the other thread just rang a bell with me due to my own experience.

Hang in there.