My great-aunt had badly ulcerated legs for her last couple of years and they made her horribly miserable because her mind was still active, but her body just refused to cooperate. Lots of things can affect your grandmother's ability to heal properly from a minor infection - sometimes things can be caught in time to prevent it, but it doesn't mean the staff did a bad job in letting it get this far. My great aunt was basically given morphine for her pain and had her dressings changed regularly, but then it wasn't just a foot, and it wasn't as severe as gangrene. I would imagine they'd have to monitor it. After all, surgery at the age of 97 is a huge risk, and if it can be avoided that's definitely what they should be doing.

None of that makes it any easier on you. I think it's time for you and the kids to get some handwritten letters, photos, artwork off to her. That will bring her some smiles and happiness, and will make you feel as if you're contributing in some small way. My aunt loved her small photo collection spanning many decades, way back to pictures of herself and her sister (my grandmother) in a play as young girls! Maybe your mother can find some old photos to bring back some happy memories.

It's horrible when you can't do as much as you want... you and five children probably wouldn't be the best thing for your grandmother just at the moment anyway!

{{{HUGS}}}

Kerri.